The "is something" happening bar?

Sometimes i get moved to be daring. It is often a spontaneous adventure spirit that just allows me to do a lot of the things that I have ever done in my life such as when I gogo danced on New Year’s Eve dressed as a Kabuki dancer on the pole they had at the club, or whenever I need fire power to go and do something I have never done before. For a while I have been mulling on the idea of going to a sex club in Tokyo and having some random and spontaneous interaction with some people there. You never know who it will be,but as a female the advantage of being daring is that you don’t have to pay to play because having a female who is willing and able in the club is the big reason why there are so many single men there in the first place. I was freer than usual which is not to say that I was horny, i really wasn’t more than usual. I have lately been quite celibate in Japan. Attaining connection in Tokyo for this purpose has been quite a challenge for me, so I’ve almost just relinquished myself to celibacy because there just simply has not been anyone who has approached me, those that have approached me have not qualified to my standards (they’ve been gruff or too drunk, or expect me to approach them first). I’m not looking for any old sex. I got bored of Tinder and how the guys on there talk to me, so I uninstalled that app. I decided casual sex on the internet wasn’t going to be fulfilling. That night, I went to a sports bar in Tokyo to watch some winter Olympics because I don’t own a TV. I sat for 2 hours at the bar, pretending to be glued to watching Curling ( a sport where teams of 3 people clean the ice for the path of a bowling ball) for an hour, looking at the bar, reflecting on my time attempting to be social in Japan, hating how things have been working for me here. The usual, no one talks to the single girl at the bar. Even in America, if someone I don’t like is talking to me, at least I feel that I have been able to check mark the social aspect of “going out and watching the game” mission. Happening bars in Japan have been the friendliest places for me. It is amazing to see and experience what I think is “normal” bar culture, which is that I am in a place where strangers will actually strike up a conversation with me. I went to the happening bar out of frustration with the 2 hours of silence at the Sports Bar. I had imagined doing exactly what I did this night many times in my mind. I doubt that it was really about the sex but more of penetrating the Japanese underground or interacting with Japanese people that was enticing to me. It was mainly for the experience and being open to whatever might or might not happen. I was actually unattached as I usually am, anytime I leave my house in Japan. I have gone to sex parties and often not had sex, and this is part of the fun. The overt possibility is there, unlike regular bars. I remember being propositioned by a decent a very sexual swinger couple visiting Japan and seeking me as a unicorn and I really wasn’t interested. I feel like Siddhartha lately, something like being too spiritually sexually woke and so disinterested in everything. I’m not exactly seeking to get laid, I was seeking connection, I think. But just like everything else in life, when you feel things are just right, you know it. I had a few drinks and put on a sexy cos play outfit from the wall of costumes that the bar has. I was surprised it actually fit me as I tend to be too L compared to the average Japanese woman, and often larger than the average Japanese man. One of the guys at the happening bar bar was cute to me he was wearing woman’s dress outfit that showed his cute ass. He was skinny and probably weighed the same as me, but likely 3 sizes down from me. “Look at your skinny little body.” I said, grabbing his waist on either side. He was doing some negotiations for his nerdy friend who was heavier with glasses, overweight and absolutely of no interest to me. “He’s a professional pussy licker,” he kept saying to me. I looked at his unattractive awkward friend and nodded and said nothing. (to be continued)